Do you have problems with toxic people and you’re eager to learn what are some common toxic people signs? Learn how to spot a toxic person and how to deal with them.
How to spot a toxic person?
Toxic people share some similar traits and behavioral patterns.
Since toxic people are omnipresent, the probability of encountering them sooner or later is very high. A toxic person can be your neighbor, colleague, friend or even a family member.
The first impression…
They spread negativity all around and are draining, overly dramatic and hard to handle. Hanging out with them has negative consequences for you, such as bad mood, exhaustion and raising negativity.
They are often controlling, self-centered, disrespectful, and negative persons. They can even gossip and drain you emotionally.
Note: Did you know? A term “toxic people” is being googled more than 33,000 times each month worldwide! – decent proof of our frequent issues with toxic people and our desire to learn how to deal with them.
Warning signs of a toxic relationship
If you are exhausted, tired, or in a bad mood after hanging out with one of them, that is the sign they are draining your energy. You can even get some physical symptoms like headaches!
Here are some common warning signs of a toxic relationship:
- bad mood & anxiety
- lack of energy
- rising negativity
These are some of the most common symptoms that you’ve been influenced by a toxic person. Do you feel that way about a certain person?
How to deal with toxic people?
Toxic relationships are fairly common. Toxic people are a type of people that do not accept any suggestions for improvements. By believing that you can change them, you make the biggest mistake. They don’t want to be changed; they love the way they are.
By sticking to them, you sacrifice your time to be a part of their negative energetic loop. And you don’t need that.
When you notice any of the toxic people signs below, it’s time to take all your courage and move on.
Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.
– Travis Bradberry
10 Important toxic people signs
These important toxic people signs will help you if you’re wondering how to spot a toxic person. Luckily, they share the same characteristics by default.
They are always complaining
They have a heavy load of negative energy to outburst at any time. In fact, the negative energy is their supreme fuel. They love negativity and all about that. They don’t appreciate any constructive criticism – they only want to burden you with their negativity. Also, they don’t have anything nice to say about others.
They are selfish
They are not interested in listening to you. They’re only interested in what they have to say and you can notice them getting bored easily when you’re changing the topics. Your point of view is not important to them. It’s all about them.
They don’t want to change
If you try to give them some reasonable advice, you can notice that they are not interested and keep repeating the same stories. They don’t want your advice, they want you to listen to all they have to say and absorb their negativity so that you become one of them.
They are always a victim
This is their favorite personality trait! Nobody understands them, all people did them wrong, etc. They love the feeling that other people are always to blame. They are always right, and other people do them wrong all the time.
They want you to agree with them anytime
They don’t need you to be an active participant in the conversation, you just have to agree with all what they have to say. Otherwise, you can feel their rage and anger rising. They are sensitive and therefore, they can’t stand being criticized.
No constructive conversation is possible with them
If you try to put some logical argument in your conversation, they can easily get mad. Or they can just be confused in the best possible scenario.
They take care only of their own needs
You are not important to them. The whole conversation is about them and their problems. They are terribly selfish and proud of that fact and you start wondering what’s wrong with them.
They get angry very easily
In fact, they are in a constant angry mode. You only need to say something they don’t like and you just watch them getting furious. You constantly have the feeling of walking on the eggshells to keep them calm. What’s even worse, they don’t let go and don’t forgive.
They can easily turn against you
You are their enemy if you have your own opinion that differs from theirs. Once they claimed to be your best friends, and now they easily become vindictive. They have an inherent hatred for other people and you’re good to them as long as you do what they want. If you disagree, you become their worst enemy.
They are highly manipulative
They don’t mind lying, or manipulating you in order to get what they want. You are their tool in fulfilling their needs, no matter what. Emotional abuse is a very common strategy they use to get what they want. Also, they are very controlling.
Read more about narcissistic abuse here.
Why do I attract controlling friends?
You might be attracting toxic people unconsciously
For the majority of people, it’s hard to deal with loneliness. Even mentioning the word solitude causes discomfort to people. Many people are terrified of solitude.
Solitude is the absence of close friends, parents, or partner. It is the absence of all the quality, deep and meaningful human connections we crave. That’s why we often consider loneliness and emptiness as equal.
Avoid being social just for the sake of being social
Of course, we all want to establish meaningful and quality connections, but it’s not always the case. However, we do not have to go to extremes and allow different toxic people to drain our energy and take over our lives. They are only the false escape from the loneliness.
If you crave meaningful connections, you won’t find them in energetic vampires.
In that case, it’s always better to be alone than in the wrong company. Therefore, it’s vital to understand and recognize toxic people signs.
But why some people avoid solitude at all cost? Why do they choose to spend their time with toxic people instead of focusing on themselves? Perhaps the sound of silence is unbearable for them.
Why are toxic relationships bad for us?
Hanging out with them too much might make you one of them
When we let them enter our world, we suppress ourselves unconsciously. We sacrifice ourselves for others. We do not ask ourselves do we really need this type of persons.
We put so much patience, efforts and hopes to believe that people can change for the better. Life has taught me, like many other people that it is not true in many cases.
When you allow a toxic person to enter your world and behave the way he wants, he will believe that he has the right to do that. If you give him a warning, he will behave as you took from him something that belongs to him.
So, no discussion is beneficial, because the probability of conflict to occur is immense. Since the conversation is of no use, you have to distance yourself. Sounds harsh, but it’s true. You have to think for yourself.
Fear of loneliness and toxic people
Making connections with others no matter what is not beneficial
What is it in us that causes the terrifying fear of loneliness and end up with the wrong people consequently? Why are we so incomprehensible to ourselves?
Our human nature seeks socialization and quality relations. If we cannot achieve at a certain moment, why to be in despair? It is better to focus on yourself then, isn’t it? Why waste your time on the wrong people?
I hope that by now you agree with me that it’s a damaging habit to consider those people as friends and try to convert them into positive persons. Learning about common toxic people signs will help you identify them and avoid them more effectively.
How to avoid toxic friends and relationships?
After you spend quality time with yourself, you’ll understand that not all people can be your friends. Once you establish a quality connection with yourself, the energetic vampires will be repellent to you and you to them, too, because you won’t be a good victim to them. Understanding how to spot a toxic person is crucial if you want to get rid of them for good. Loving and understanding yourself are a precondition to keep them away.
Build your self-confidence and overcome the fear of loneliness
How to avoid toxic friends? This is a work in progress that is based on building your self-confidence. By becoming more self-consciousness, you’ll learn how to overcome the dangerous fear of loneliness. You’ll be able to recognize fake people with their aura of negativity quick. Here is some quick advice on how to start:
- Focus on yourself. It is the most reasonable thing you can do at that moment.
- Get to know yourself.
- Understand what are the main causes that force you to surround yourself with false people.
- Spend enjoyable time with yourself.
- Treat yourself like you are your best friend.
- Indulge in things that lift your mood.
- Treat yourself with compassion and understanding.
- Let your mistakes be your valuable life lessons.
- Enjoy little things.
- Reconnect with nature.
- Boost your self-esteem.
- Love yourself and enjoy your own company.
By recognizing these toxic people signs, you’ll be vulnerable no more to them.