Do you have problems with toxic people? And yet you are not sure what are some common toxic people signs? Well, this is a fairly common problem. Toxic people signs are often not easy to see. Especially if we meet a person for the first time.
How to identify toxic people?
Toxic people share some similar traits and behavioral patterns. Since they have a bad impact on our mood, energy, and emotions, the first step towards identifying them is defining how you feel when you’re around them.
Define in a few words how you feel about them
If you are exhausted, tired, or in a bad mood after hanging out with them, that is the sign they are draining your energy. You can even get some physical symptoms like headaches!
Do you feel that way about a certain person?
If you have an urge to fix them – don’t!
Toxic people are a type of people that do not accept any suggestions and keep repeating the same old stories they have. By believing that you can change them positively, you make the biggest mistake. They don’t want to be changed; they love the way they are.
You sacrifice your time to be a part of their negative energetic loop. You don’t need that. You deserve healthy and happy relationships! Unfortunately, toxic relationships are fairly common.
The sad truth is that you can’t make it with everybody. When you notice any of the toxic people signs below, it’s time to take all your courage and strength and move on.
Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.
– Travis Bradberry
Here are 10 important toxic people signs that can help you identify them promptly:
They are always complaining
They have a heavy load of negative energy to outburst at any time. In fact, the negative energy is their supreme fuel. They love negativity and all about that.
They are not interested in listening to you
They’re only interested in what they have to say and you can notice them getting bored easily when you’re changing the topics. Your point of view is not important to them.
They do not seek advice, they want to overload you with their negative energy
If you try to give them some reasonable advice, you can notice that they are not interested and keep repeating the same stories. They don’t want your advice, they want you to listen to all they have to say and absorb their negativity so that you become one of them.
They are always a victim
This is their favorite personality trait! Nobody understands them, all people did them wrong, etc. They love the feeling that the other people are always to blame.
They want you to agree with them anytime
They don’t need you to be an active participant in the conversation, you just have to agree with all what they have to say.
No constructive conversation is possible with them
If you try to put some logical argument in your conversation, they can easily get mad. Or they can just be confused in the best possible scenario.
They take care only of their own needs
You are not important to them. The whole conversation is about them and their problems. They are terribly selfish and proud of that fact and you start wondering what’s wrong with them.
They get angry very easily
In fact, they are in a constant angry mode. You only need to say something they don’t like and you just watch them getting furious. You constantly have the feeling of walking on the eggshells to keep them calm.
They can easily turn against you
You are their enemy if you have your own opinion that differs from theirs. Once they claimed to be your best friends, and now they easily become vindictive.
They are highly manipulative
They don’t mind lying, or manipulating you in order to get what they want. You are their tool in fulfilling their needs, no matter what.
Read more about narcissistic abuse here.
You might be attracting toxic people unconsciously
For the majority of people, it’s hard to deal with loneliness. Even mentioning the word solitude causes discomfort to people. Many people are terrified about the solitude.
Solitude is the absence of close friends, parents, or partner. It is the absence of all the quality, deep and meaningful human connections we crave. That’s why we often consider loneliness and emptiness as equal.
What’s worse – toxic people or solitude?
Of course that we all want to establish meaningful and quality connections, but it’s not always the case. However, we do not have to go to extremes and allow different toxic people to drain our energy and take over our lives. They are only the false escape from the loneliness.
If you crave meaningful connections, you won’t find them in energetic vampires.
In that case, it’s always better to be alone than in the wrong company. Therefore, it’s vital to understand and recognize toxic people signs.
But why some people avoid solitude at all cost? Why do they choose to spend their time with toxic people instead of focusing on themselves? Perhaps the sound of silence is unbearable for them.
Learning about the most prominent toxic people signs will make it easier to distance from them
So, in what ways are toxic people bad for us?
When we let them enter our world, we suppress ourselves unconsciously. We sacrifice ourselves for others. We do not ask ourselves do we really need this type of persons.
We put so much patience, efforts and hopes to believe that people can change for the better. Life has taught me, as many other people that it is not true in many cases.
When you allow a toxic person to enter your world and behave the way he wants, he will believe that he has the right to do that. If you give him a warning, he will behave like you took from him something that belongs to him.
So, no discussion is beneficial, because the probability of a conflict to occur is immense. Since the conversation is of no use, you have to distance yourself. Sounds harsh, but it’s true. You have to think for yourself.
Hanging out with them too much might make you one of them
Since I hated to be alone for years, I did my best to make some friends. However, it didn’t turn out that well. Since the fear of loneliness paralyzed me, I assume that I radiated the bad vibrations and therefore attracted the wrong people.
Consequently, I became negative, too! I complained about a lot of things, but at the same time, I did exactly nothing to improve my life!
Making connections with others no matter what is not beneficial
What is it in us that causes the terrifying fear of loneliness and end up with the wrong people consequently? Why are we so incomprehensible to ourselves?
Our human nature seeks socialization and quality relations. If we cannot achieve at a certain moment, why to be in a despair? It is better to focus on yourself then, isn’t it? Why waste your time on the wrong people?
I hope that by now you agree with me that it’s a damaging habit to consider those people as friends and try to convert them into positive persons. Learning about common toxic people signs will help you identify them and avoid them more effectively.
What should you do instead?
Focus on yourself. It is the most reasonable thing you can do at that moment.
Get to know yourself.
Understand what are the main causes that force you to surround yourself with false people.
Spend the enjoyable time with yourself.
Treat yourself like you are your best friend.
Indulge in things that lift your mood.
Treat yourself with compassion and understanding.
Let your mistakes be your valuable life lessons.
Enjoy little things.
Reconnect with nature.
Boost your self-esteem.
Love yourself and enjoy your own company.
A valuable life lesson…
After you spend a quality time with yourself, you’ll understand that not all people can be your friends. Once you establish a quality connection with yourself, the energetic vampires will be repellent to you and you to them, too, because you won’t be a good victim to them.
By recognizing these toxic people signs, you’ll be vulnerable no more to them.